After All This Time, I’m Probably Doing It Wrong (And Why It Doesn’t Matter)

There’s no right way to be wrong, but even then, I’m probably doing it wrong. There are a whole number of topics that could apply to but I won’t tease you or leave you hanging (for long anyway) to figure out what I talking about.

It was 8 years ago today that I came out to my friends and family. “Oh, ok” was the typical response when I revealed the secret that I’d been hiding. Pretty much no muss, no fuss. Even though it had been going on for a little while, I’d wanted to wait until I had figured out a few things and felt comfortable with everyone knowing. I’d picked this day as my goal to be ready and to have everything in place. The Husband already knew (he was quite supportive) and I think I had shared the news with our kids as well. It was the rest of my world that didn’t know.

To be honest, I’m still a little bit shy to talk about it even though it is something that I take great pride in. Mostly, I think that’s because I feel like I’m probably doing it wrong. Not that there’s an absolute right way to do it but I could be more strategic, I could be more diligent, and I could be more engaging.

Hopefully, you’ve by now guessed that I’m talking about blogging as opposed to something else. I chose this day 8 years ago as my blog reveal day as a gift to myself because it was also my birthday. Still is my birthday.

The first day my blog went live with a published post had occurred two months prior in early August. That first post was titled I Don’t Understand The Question and there was only one image in it. I was skittish about actually appearing on the blog so that image was of shoes (which makes sense if you’ve read the post). On the day of my blog reveal, I published my 13th blog post.

In most years, I’ve celebrated my blogaversary in August but that didn’t happen this time around (see The Summer Of My Discontent). Nothing wrong with having a belated celebration, right? So that’s what we’ve got going on today. And it’s my birthday.

I get a kick out of reading my past blogaversay posts although the one for 2019 was published on my birthday that year as well (see 2016, 2017, 2018, 2019, 2020, 2021, and 2022 for the other years). In each, I’d ponder on whether I would still be blogging in another year. There have been a couple of stretches over the years when I would “lose my mojo” and consider closing up shop as they say. Each time I’ve concluded that writing this blog felt/feels too important to me to stop, so I didn’t/don’t.

One of the things I usually include in my blogaversary posts are some stats about the blog. In the past 8 years, I’ve published over 450 blog posts on a variety of topics but mostly about fashion and what I like to wear. So far this year, the post with the most views is once again DIY: Retirement Survival Kit which I wrote 7 years ago. It has consistently been a high achiever year after year. The next three with the highest view counts were all written in 2023 and they are; Size Denial And A New ‘Fit’ness Plan, How To Live Your Best Life, and Editorial Planning.

For a while (a long while), I’ve been giving some thought to the direction of this blog as well as my original intentions. What’s my angle? What do I want to say? What’s the value of what I write? There have been times that I’ve fallen into the trap of comparing myself to other bloggers which is not very productive. A few random discussions with non-bloggers have given me some great ideas and inspirations.

By now you might have started to wonder about what I think I’m doing wrong? I second-guess myself. I have no problem developing an editorial plan but then I get stuck. Figuring out the look to go with the content and then getting the photos taken can be a huge mental challenge. I get stuck in my head and it can be difficult to move forward.

The nature of social media has changed and with those shifts, these platforms have become primary sources of information themselves and are no longer ancillary to blogs as they once were. I now view my Instagram account as mostly something separate from my blog because neither seems to generate traffic to the other. My Facebook page gets hardly any notice and what’s with Threads? Perhaps I’m doing something wrong with all of this.

Then there’s the question of whether or not to monetize. After all, shouldn’t a blog make money? I rather like the look of my blog uncluttered by ads. Of the few legitimate brands that have reached out for a collaboration, none have really appealed to me. If I can’t be authentic, then what’s the point? While I do occasionally include affiliate links, that program has changed from click to purchase-based so the pennies I had been earning have just about disappeared.

I don’t quite know if I’m doing it wrong or not because, much to the chagrin of The Husband, I don’t blog to generate an income. Many of the standard metrics for measuring the success of a blog (or any business endeavor) are related to earnings and in my case, they don’t apply. I’m aware that some bloggers are moving over to Substack but since I don’t monetize or want to charge a fee, I don’t see the point in me doing that. Maybe I’m wrong about this, too?

As I was putting this post together, I reread the blogaversary post from last year which included a brief review of the prior 12 months. And you know, not much has changed since. Still loving retirement by the ocean, still baking with my pandemic sourdough starter, our oldest child still lives in another state, and our youngest still lives with us. We have traveled some more, even went on a cruise this past summer, and caught COVID again.

I’ve rambled on long enough about what I may or may not be doing wrong but the one thing I am doing right is celebrating my birthday. The Husband and I are in the midst of a mini trip, driving on a few roads we’ve never traveled along before. We’re heading to a destination that I’ve wanted to visit for some time and I’m hoping that we’ll get in some fall leaf peeping as well. That’s not such an easy achievement in Southern California. I’ll be sharing the highlights of our adventures in a future post and maybe on the ‘Gram.

So whether I’m doing it wrong or not, as long as this blog continues to challenge me, continues to record my life, and continues to connect me with other midlife women who enrich my life (and it does all three counts), it will be around for as long as I am.

Stay well and let’s keep in touch! Subscribe, tweet, follow, friend, pin … all options are available. I look forward to hearing from you soon.

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Note: This is an unsponsored post; however, some or all of the links to clothing items are associated with an affiliate program where I earned a few cents for each click.

Photo credit: MMPerez