For as long as I can remember, I’ve loved to shop. Primarily clothing, but in my view, shopping is a sport. In a playful twist on a famous philosophical statement, “I shop, therefore I am” feels like an apt motto for this sport.
Like with any sport, it takes practice to perfect one’s skills. Navigating sales, knowing your favorite stores inside and out, and understanding what truly works for you make all the difference. Each purchase becomes a marker of the journey—whether it’s a carefully planned buy or an impulse win. Just like athletes define themselves by their skills and victories, I sometimes define myself by the wardrobe I’ve curated, the deals I’ve scored, and the way those pieces make me feel.
On the other hand, I can’t help but wonder how much of my identity is tied to the things I buy rather than who I truly am. I want the style choices I make to reflect my personality, my intentions, and the image I want to project to the world. But I also wonder, am I really expressing myself, or just following trends dictated by an industry that’s always changing?
There’s a fine line between curating personal style and simply consuming what’s popular, and I sometimes struggle with where I stand. Shopping for fashion is as much about fitting in as it is about standing out, and it makes me question how much of my “style” is really mine.
Like many women “of a certain maturity”, I’ve been finding it increasingly difficult to find clothing that truly fits my style and tastes. It feels like so much of the fashion industry either overlooks women beyond 30-something or pigeon-holes us into staid, frumpy styles all in the name of “classic” and “comfort”.
While expressing myself through my clothes is important, I don’t want it to be at the expense of feeling awkward or forced into styles that don’t reflect who I am today. As a retiree, I no longer need a professional look but knocking around in just jeans and a T-shirt doesn’t cut it for me either. Nor do I yet feel “old” enough for most of the styles carried in stores like C’s, Ts, and JJ. What’s a gal to do?
Since you asked (or maybe I just imagined that you did), I’d like to share a few insights I’ve gained during my decades of shopping experience. They’re akin to the guidelines I offered last Fall in Fashion Facts When You’re Over 50: 2 Truths, 1 Lie. Just a few reminders to take with you as you venture into the retail hellscape.
First and foremost, ignore the rules. Most are lies, told only to shake your confidence and entice you to buy something you don’t truly want. You don’t need to buy what everyone else is wearing, or stick to neutral colors, or dress for your age (whatever that means) if those choices do not resonate with you. Look for items that spark joy and make you feel authentic.
Second, stay open to trying new things. It can freshen your perspective and help you discover new sides of yourself. Experimenting with different looks can boost your confidence and get you to step outside your comfort zone. You might find you can carry off a color, or cut, or trend you had never considered before.
Lastly, look for fun and unique details. A little or a lot, they add pops of visual interest and keep things exciting. Wearing the same type of clothing day in and day out can feel stale, but exploring new styles adds variety and creativity to your life. Sometimes, we get stuck in the mindset of “this is what works for me,” when in reality, there’s so much more out there that could enhance your look or align better with where you are in life.
I think that I achieved all three of those points in my look. Considering them to be clashing neutrals, some style experts will tell you to never mix black and brown. I, on the other hand, believe that it is a brilliant pairing so I definitely ignore this particular fashion rule. I don’t limit myself by sticking only to the retailers or store brands/departments marketing themselves to my demographic. No harm in browsing through those that we would normally think of as “juniors” as opposed to “missus”. That’s where I found both my top and pants. And did you notice the pockets? Talk about a detail that catches the eye!
Trying new styles lets you have fun with fashion, explore your creativity, and stay engaged with the world around you, rather than staying boxed into old habits or perceptions. At least that’s what I’ve told myself as I may or may not have gotten a little carried away lately with recent additions to my wardrobe. My own Fall edit, as it were. Shown below are some of these additions, all of which I look forward to wearing in real life and in upcoming posts.
Shopping, when done right, is an expression of who I am. It’s not just about accumulating things but crafting a wardrobe that reflects my identity, personality, and lifestyle. So, when I hit the stores, I’m not just shopping—I’m competing in a sport where my sense of self is the ultimate prize. What are you shopping for this Fall?
Stay well and let’s keep in touch! Subscribe, follow, friend, pin … all options are available. I look forward to hearing from you soon.
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Photo credit: MMPerez
Note: This is an unsponsored post; however, some or all of the links to clothing items are associated with an affiliate program where I earned a few cents for each click.
Now, onto the Fine-Whatever link-up. Contributed by Marsha over at Marsha In The Middle, featured from last week’s link-up is her Completely Speechless post. I can completely relate to her struggles with procrastination and meeting deadlines. Marsha and I are kindred spirits in so many ways.
11 Comments
A thoughtful piece. I seem to have lost my joy in seeking and shopping for clothes, mainly because it’s not easy to find the retro styles I love, and also the colors (except in spring). Looking forward to seeing those leopard pants!
I love those cargo pants! I tend to pick up clothing from any and all departments as long as I like the style.
Love the cool cargos! I agree with all your points. Rules are meant to be broken!
https://www.kathrineeldridge.com
I am not fond of shopping. I’m more of a “let the things find me” kinda gal. And find me they do. (Though I’ve had a slew of Poshmark mistakes the past couple of years. Crossed signals, I guess).
I enjoyed this post very much! You make some very valid points. I seem to be in a bit of a shopping slump right now. Finding things I like does seem to be becoming more of a treasure hunt. But I do like to shop, and will persevere!
I have a very similar attitude – I enjoy shopping, often looking and waiting ages to find exactly what I want. On the other hand, I’m quite partial to an impulse buy too! I love those cargo pants!
Emma xxx
http://www.style-splash.com
I always love your posts because they make me think, Rena. I don’t know that I have a personal style even though I have a very evident blog style. I really need to go through my closet and get rid of so much just because I DO know it’s not me.
You look fabulous in those pants which has me thinking I could possibly pull them off, too, though I think you may be taller than me. Thank you so much for the feature…we definitely are kindred spirits! And, thank you for the link up this week, too!
https://marshainthemiddle.com/
I agree wholeheartedly! I had a small shopping outing yesterday and came home with 2 times, one was some pull on denim pants with a little cuff. I just pulled out my jeans so I can see which I will wear this year. There are a couple pairs that might make it in the donation bin in the spring if I don’t wear them at all. I love this relaxed look on you. It is fun to do something different. I have found a pair of wide cargos like those that I have liked yet, but have tried some.
http://www.chezmireillefashiontravelmom.com
I love this look on you! I look forward to seeing you wear those fun leopard pants!
So very interesting and looking very nice. Thanks for hosting and I hope that you have a wonderful week.
Like this outfit, the chocolate shade is perfect. Sorry I missed the linkup. Will come join next time xx Jacqui