There often comes a point (or two or twenty) when we’ll find ourselves asking no one in particular “am I doing it all wrong”? Or it might be a kindhearted soul ((AKA rude twit)) who offers a personal observation that triggers our self-doubt.
It’s not just sex that sells but negativity as well. Whether it’s in social media, news articles, and entertainment channels, what grabs the most attention? Words or statements that incite a strong reaction. Back in January, I touched on this topic in Less Of This, More Of That when I included the heavily used term “slammed” in my list of items I’d be happy to be rid of.
A thought popped into my head a while back … “what if I’m doing it all wrong?”. It happened during one of my daily walks and I don’t recall that the thought was related to anything specific. As I pondered on this idea for a bit, it occurred to me that I could use it for a post topic. After all, if I’ve learned anything as a blogger, it’s that inspiration can come from even the oddest of thoughts. So in no particular order, I present the 5 key reasons why it doesn’t matter if you’re doing it all wrong.
Reason 1 – We learn best from our mistakes. No amount of preparation can replace the knowledge and experience is gained through trial and error. It is from our successes, and to a lesser degree our failures, that we gain the confidence and wisdom to continue to move forward.
Reason 2 – Not all missteps are bad. Insights gained from failures are often more useful that easily achieved successes. Rarely is a failure the end of the road but instead a detour that leads to a course correction that simply confirms you’re still heading in the right direction.
Reason 3 – Someone else’s wrong may be your right. Recently, I came across this article on Stylist about the “Hot Girl Walk” fitness trend that’s currently buzzing on TikTok. Basically, it’s about how you can use your
walking routine to psychological changes along with the physical ones. The TikToker behind the trend promotes listening to an inspirational podcast or a motivational playlist during a 4-mile walk while focusing exclusively on what you’re grateful for, your goals, and how hot you are. Personally, my preference while walking is to do it sans music or any other external program. My attention is on my surroundings, the physicality of what I’m doing, and the random ideas that pop into my thoughts. Who’s method is better? Does it matter?
Reason 4 – One size rarely fits all. We are all uniquely individual with varying wants and needs. And those wants and needs can and will change over time. What was wrong before may turn out to be right after all and vice versa. Adaptation is another skill that is honed when facing a challenge.
Reason 5 – Only you know what’s right for you. That’s what it comes down to. Don’t be less authentic due to the opinions of others. Whether it’s growing out your natural hair color, making fashion choices like mixing florals and stripes, or quitting your corporate job to start a farming venture, be mindful that advice from others may be from a place of personal fear or bias. Ultimately, it’s only your opinion that truly matters.
Outfit info: dress, available at Kohl’s; jacket, Chico’s (old); Sandals, Circus by Sam Edelman (old)
Let’s Wrap This Up
Now, onto the Fine-Whatever link-up. My featured blogger from the last link-up is Shelbee, who shares her insights about life, parenting, and of course fashion on her blog Shelbee On The Edge.
As for me, I rarely really wonder if I’m doing it all wrong because I’m happy with what I see in myself and, most importantly, how I feel. What is something that you’re doing all wrong? Whose opinions do you value the most? Do you ever fall victim to self-doubt?
Stay well and let’s keep in touch! Subscribe, tweet, follow, friend, pin … all options are available. I look forward to hearing from you soon.
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Note: This is an unsponsored post; however, some or all of the links to clothing items are associated with an affiliate program where I earned a few cents for each click.
Photos: MMPerez
24 Comments
I agree with all of these points! We can’t grow unless we make mistakes along the way and only we know what is right for ourselves! Love your pretty dress and sandals!
Jill – Doused in Pink
Its official – I love your hair!
And you make great points in your post; life is tricky like that. Its why I choose to listen to Someone bigger than me, but even that becomes tricky. See my latest post.
Love that dress very much on you! Great colors! I do agree in many of these points. And btw, I like to walk and just enjoy the nature and surroundings too! 😉 It really is up to us what we choose and how we learn from our mistakes in life.
Have a great week!
jess xx
http://www.elegantlydressedandstylish.com
I am sure that my home management strategies are WRONG by someone’s standards, but I refuse to put projects ahead of people.
Thanks for hosting the party! I shared from both of my blogs. Hope your week goes fantastic.
All of these are wonderful points to discuss and think about. Reason 5 really resonates with me as I try to figure out my place in the blog world. I am trying to be true to myself yet find I am easily swayed by blogs with so much more experience. You would think, at 64, I’d have things figured out…but I am definitely a work in progress and constantly evolving! Thanks for the thought provoking post and the link party! Come visit on Thursday for an Ageless Style link party!
https://marshainthemiddle.com/
I think the same as you. I don’t care if I’m doing wrong, if it feels good to me it’s fine. Have a great day!
It’s so easy to blame yourself for everything, but we need to trust our wisdom and live experiences to believe that our actions are not wrong. Love your outfit, Rena. Thanks for hosting
https://lookingfabulousat50.blogspot.com/
Yes I sometimes have doubts and think I’ve done it wrong BUT I believe that most of us do what we feel is for the best at the time. So whether I feel I should be more tolerant, need to apologize or even to forgive myself, I like to clear the decks ready to move forward again. I’m a great believer in not leaving things on the wrong foot.
Rena, what a fabulous post and such a beautifully worded message. There are certain things that I wonder if I am doing them wrong, but I generally am able to shift fairly quickly back to your sentiments of who cares. Then my confidence that I am doing it right is restored. I am happy and healthy and grateful for all the blessings in my life. Perspective and gratitude keep me grounded in the most beautiful place. And I always say, “Different doesn’t mean wrong.”
I love this dress on you and the way you have styled it is so very true to your style. Gorgeous! Thanks so much for the feature, too! That was a fun surprise. I featured you on my blog today!
Shelbee
That dress is lovely on you and I really like the stripes with it! I’ve had a lot of things go wrong lately but that aside, for the most part there is no right or wrong way to do things – everyone has their own personal preferences and liking something different doesn’t mean it’s wrong! the big range of fashion available to buy before you even think about styling an outfit is proof of that 🙂
Thanks for the link up! Hope you are having a good week 🙂
I love that last picture! I agree we learn from our mistakes and doing things a certain way can help us grow.
http://www.chezmireillefashiontravelmom.com
Wow, you look lovely in this dress Rena, that colour really suits you. Thanks for hosting the linkup too. Have a super week. Jacqui x
This is such a wonderful post! You make so many great points and I love your perspective on it all! Thanks for sharing this, it was definitely needed!
I don’t have a lot of self doubt and I think it’s one of the joys of getting old. But I worry about how judgemental many young people are, forever trying to cancel people for holding a different opinion. What happened to objective debate?
First off, I adore this outfit! That dress is so pretty, and the jacket and sandals are perfect with it.
Really great topic, Rena! I am kind of weird in regard to the concept of “wrong.” I personally put very few things in the wrong category, and those that do fall into that category have to do with doing something that would hurt other people or myself. With things like personal style, fashion, interior decorating, the worst that can happen is that I create something ugly. That hurts no one and can be fixed. Am I doing it non-traditionally? Probably. Do I care? Not at all. As far as whose opinions I rely on, I have a handful of people I trust to be 100% honest, and myself. (In some cases, I rely on experts.)
And if I’m in doubt, I have no problem asking for other’s opinions. I always learn something.
So this is my long-winded way of saying that I agree with you. 😄
Michelle
https://mybijoulifeonline.com
Another cracking post Rena. I expect I take heed of my son’s advice, he doesn’t advise often but when he does it’s a blinder! Oh and perhaps YOU, my linked post is inspired by your recent Coastal Granny post and you get a mention!
Hugs Mary xxx.
I have never heard of the term “slammed” before. As a Christian, I follow God’s word for my life and only His word. So I’m probably out of the norm of society group think by that alone. Love your outfit.
I agree with everything and when people are negative they are scared of what you are doing because they start to feel out of their comfort zone.
It’s true that the trial-and-error method is the only way we can truly learn. When we make a mistake or fail at something, we allow ourselves the chance to reflect, make changes, and try again. By the way, I love your outfit!
xoxo
Lovely
wwww.mynameislovely.com
Rena, Reason 3 really resonated with me. Like you, “my preference while walking is to do it sans music or any other external program. My attention is on my surroundings, the physicality of what I’m doing, and the random ideas that pop into my thoughts.” Your outfit today is so perfectly suited to you, you can’t possibly have any doubts about it! It’s all wrong for me, but just right for you. And one of my friends could carry it off well.
These reasons are so important, thank you for sharing. You look incredible and I love the photos!
Laila
http://www.lailanblog.blogspot.com
This is so on point Rena, I loved reading this. It’s a whole new attitude and way of processing what we think is all wrong- love it! I also checked out the link for the hot girl walk- and found it super interesting as well. Thanks for sharing. Have a great weekend xx
Being “wrong” is all about perspective — Great tips on how making mistakes can actually benefit us.
Thank you for hosting the link-up.
Carol
http://www.scribblingboomer.com